Browsing Tag

Humility

Bless Your Heart by Cindy Colley

Sister to Sister: Mark 10 and Maggie

Posted on November 8, 2019

It’s relevant to notice that Jesus said some words about receiving the kingdom of heaven as a little child right in between two very difficult teachings—teachings that were too hard for those to whom they were spoken. Here are the words of Jesus from Mark 10:

“Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God. Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein.”

Just before that, Jesus had taught the still-disputed doctrine about how that second marriages, in cases where former partners are still living, are adulterous. That’s a hard teaching, both in the first century world and today. In fact, the strong wonder at the prohibition of remarriage was expressed, even by his own disciples, in the parallel passage, Matthew 19: 3-12. (That’s the passage in which Jesus does give the one exception for acceptable divorce and remarriage)

Then, following the statement about children and the kingdom comes the teaching to the rich young ruler about denying his possessions and following Christ—the teaching about surrendering all for the Lord. It was a teaching that made the ruler leave with a sad heart and in an undone condition before the Lord. It was just too hard. 

Have you ever thought about why this little episode of the children coming to the Lord was included by the Holy Spirit right in between the difficult and demanding teachings—the life altering responsibilities commanded by the Lord? 

Having spent the last few days with my grand-daughter Maggie, who is fifteen months old, I’ve been amazed by her sweet little spirit of compliance. Her eyes look at her parents like “What do you want me to do?” Her spirit is broken when they spank her (pretty gently) for inattention to their instructions or for momentary disobedience. They push her every single time to respond by saying “yes ma’am”or “yes sir.” They use those words each time already, although she is currently just nodding her assent, until she learns to form those words. But every single time she nods her submission and then is expected to proceed with obedience. It occurs to me that this is how, in a sense, she’s already receiving the kingdom. This is how we are to receive the kingdom; with unquestioning compliance and humility. And this is the opposite of the disposition   of the Pharisees, who came in an attempt to entrap the Lord. This is the antithesis of the heart of the rich young ruler who walked away. 

Here are five things about Maggie right now that are, in my judgment, characteristic of the hearts we are to have when receiving the kingdom: 

  1. She’s always looking at her parents to see if they are near and if they are approving. Are you looking to your Father and desiring His approval?
  2. It’s often through tears that she nods her assent to the instruction that she, at first, failed to obey. Are you learning from the sorrowful consequences of sin?
  3. She often says the actual word “obey” when she’s thinking about the will of her parents. Do you meditate on submission as you strive to be holy?
  4. The Bible is the one book of which she already knows the title. Is the Bible the most important source of information in your life? 
  5. When she hears the garage door open, she looks at her mother and says with excitement,   “Dada?” She’s always looking for His coming. Are you watching for the coming?

And while we are at it, give some grace to this Mammy while she tells you a few more things that are pretty special about Maggie Joy Colley. Seriously, you don’t have to read. These are here so I can remember these precious Maggie/Mammy days. 

  1. 5:50 a.m. is my favorite time with Maggie. No one else is up and so I can steal in and take her from the crib when she awakens and she comes to lay in my bed with me and we just talk about eggs and “bendas” (bananas) and apples (her first perfect two-syllable word, except “Mama” and “Mimi” and “Mammy”.) Do you notice a theme here in her morning conversation? Eating is her passion.
  2.  She wants to wear my jewelry and my keys around her neck. She wants to be “big”  like Mammy. Everything she wants is indicated by sign language. She signs the word “more”. That means so much more…than more. It means “I have a request. Can you try and figure out what it is?”
  3. She found a tiny little man drawn on the sticker inside her kiddie pool. He’s about a quarter of an inch tall and he is on that sticker to warn parents about the dangers of drowning in that little six-inch pool. She’s obsessed with that little man on that sticker and every morning she remembers to ask to go out and see “man”. If you don’t understand what “man” means, she leads you to the back door and points at that pool. (Can you see that tiny little sticker?)
  4. Everything including the counter, the bed, the scooter, the suitcase—everything you can get up on—is a “vroom-vroom”.
  5. She wants to choose which color diaper she wears. (Those cloth diapers do offer a much bigger variety these days.)
  6. She loves to look at my Plunder necklace that has my mother and me in a locket; only she points to my mother and says “Papa” over and over. Is there a resemblance between her late great-grandmother and Glenn? Hmmm.
  7. Her favorite book, and the only one of which she knows the title, is the Bible. 
  8. Her favorite time of the day is Bible time, with the possible exception of every snack time. She loves any food that’s in a package. 
  9. We take long walks together and when I point to the moon and say “Who made the moon?” she’s learned to answer “Dod did.”
  10. Her mother has emphasized that what the Bible says is that “Jesus loves Maggie,” so when we ask her what the Bible is about, she says “Me!”
  11. Her favorite animal is a dog. Her favorite thing to watch on TV (well, really her only thing) is classic Winnie the Pooh (just the 2.5 minute theme song, but she can boogie to that). Her favorite food group is fruit and she REALLY loves those fruit puree pouches. We may or may not have made a couple of impulse purchases while we were out shopping. 
  12. She can stay quietly in a shopping cart for an extraordinarily long time, just looking at all the amazing things on shelves and racks, while pointing out all dogs and bendas and apples and vroom-vrooms.
  13. She has some “dog” house slippers. They are way too big for her feet, so I put them on over her real shoes. She waves at the dogs, in turn, once she gets them on her feet. Then she sticks  her legs up under her high chair tray and feeds the dogs part of her breakfast. (Darcy, the real dog, loves that game!)
  14. Transferring items from one container to the other is her favorite activity. 
  15. She’s perfect.
Bless Your Heart by Cindy Colley

Guest Writer, Grace Yocum: Others Down/Self Up?

Posted on May 21, 2018

(Grace is 12 years old. She speaks with clarity about a temptation faced by many young teens. In fact, maybe we should all examine ourselves to be sure we approach relationships with humility. Edited by Cindy Colley)

Have you ever met someone who thinks she is just very cool; perhaps a “popular girl”? Did you feel like you were less important and left out? If you have, then maybe you didn’t have feelings of love towards this person. You may have even reacted by putting her down with your words or actions, or even spread an ugly rumor about her so that she wouldn’t be liked by as many people. Maybe you thought this would make you feel more important. Maybe if that person wasn’t so cool and popular, you would have a better chance at being cool and popular. Maybe you were jealous of this person, and put her down to “lift yourself up” or feel better about yourself. Unfortunately many around have us fallen into this bad habit. Do not be tricked into thinking that this is okay, because it is not. Ecclesiastes 12:14 says, “For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.” This means that if you make bad decisions with your words and actions towards your neighbors, God will judge you by all of your actions, good or bad. Further, you and I should always think of the golden rule! When you think about treating someone badly, you should think again. 

Strong Christians don’t put others down; they lift them up. Paul said in 1 Thessalonians five, verse eleven, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up….”  When you encourage others you feel much better about yourself than when you are putting others down. Insecure people have to make excuses and put others down to feel confident; but confidence isn’t walking into a room with your nose in the air and thinking you are better than everyone else. It’s walking into a room and not having to compare yourself to anyone in the first place. It makes God happy when you help other people, and it makes the devil happy when you discourage people. So instead of putting people down for being cool or popular, maybe you should figure out what is wrong in your own life that makes you need to put them down. Exactly what is it about yourself that makes you insecure? Be an encourager! It is far more effective to be a person who encourages others than it is to spend your time criticizing, ridiculing, and finding  flaws. Not only will you feel better about yourself for being a force for good, but you’ll be making a positive difference in people’s lives. Refuse to put people down. Refuse to do to others what you wouldn’t like done to you. Help people live their lives in a positive way by encouraging more of what you’d like to see in the world. Lift people up and raise their spirits. Make friends; not enemies. Be kind. Be encouraging. Be honest. Inspire others to live with integrity, and lead by example. 

You can be confident without wanting to be better or thinking you are better than everyone else! Putting others down shines a very bright and unflattering light on your character, or lack of such. Philippians two, verse three, says “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.” 

If you have an humble character, then most likely you won’t have the temptation to put others down.  C.S. Lewis once wisely said “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” Colossians 3:12 tells us to clothe ourselves with humility. We need to realize that we can still be happy and confident even if we don’t try to get a “one-up.”

We are always responsible for our actions, no matter how we feel. The next time you find yourself in a situation where you want to discourage someone, think of what God has told you to do with your words and actions, and remember that you need to encourage others and think of yourself less. 

Bless Your Heart by Cindy Colley

Dissenters Briskly Removed!

Posted on March 9, 2017

It is one of the hallmark traits of liberal thinking when a view is stated and, in the stating of it, there is an automatic preclusion of any disagreement or dissenting idea by others . Examples are everywhere you look, particularly in the writings and conversation of millennials:

On Facebook: “Feel free to comment, but negative remarks will be briskly deleted.”

On Twitter: “No time for haters.”  (Of course, often a “hater” is a person who expresses disagreement with a premise or application of such.)

In a letter: “Those who are characterized by fragility will feel compelled to be defensive about this…” 

On the phone: “You just haven’t come to understand this issue yet and so we cannot have a dialog.” 

All of these, as you can see, are different ways to say “You cannot have input in this conversation because you do not agree with me.” Interestingly enough, the very view being expressed, with which folks are not allowed to disagree, is most often an espousal made in the name of “tolerance.”

Very often today, the people for whom there is not time or space for comment are those who are  in a different age group, particularly those who are older—who have lived a bit longer than millennials.

Don’t get me wrong. I think those in their twenties and thirties who are attempting to contribute to conversations about political, ethical, social, and spiritual issues are often bright and well-informed. I think ideas emerging are often fresh and innovative. I can learn a lot from them IF the perspective is one of honesty, humility and objectivity. It’s the preclusion—the foregone conclusion that one has arrived at truth and dissenters will be “removed and blocked”…therein lies the problem. 

I’ve thought about Titus 2 a lot lately when reading millennial writers. If older men are to teach younger men in the Lord’s body…if older women are to teach younger women ( and that’s the acceptable scenario to prevent blasphemy of the Word)….I say, if these commanded conversations about relationships and daily Christian living are going to occur, the younger heart has to be malleable, kind, gentle and inquiring. The “all dissenters will be deleted” prohibition is not in Titus 2. In fact it’s not in the description of what is good:

He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? (Micah 6:8).

I pray that Titus 2 scenarios can be plentiful and blessed in the kingdom today. I certainly do not have all the answers now, but I surely am thankful for some older women who helped me figure out some very important things when I was younger. In fact, I’m thankful for some sixty, seventy, and eighty-somethings who are still helping this fifty-something figure things out.  

That’s my view for today. All dissenters welcome!

Bless Your Heart by Cindy Colley

Resolution: Don’t Be Part of the 92 Percent!

Posted on January 2, 2017

As I write it’s only a couple of hours till the dawn of 2017. The ball will drop in Times Square. If the rain lets up, fireworks will pop in my neighborhood. Alcohol will be consumed in extreme amounts in bars all over town. And Christians will prepare for worship tomorrow, just the same as we do every Saturday night. Forty-five percent of Americans will make a New Year’s resolution that’s destined to be broken by 92 percent of those who’ve made a New Year’s vow. Here are five resolution tips that I’ve learned the hard way after about 40 years of making New Year’s resolutions:

  1. One resolution, for people who are already trying to follow God’s plan through life, is generally better than a list. It’s easier to remember  and it makes for better focus on the improvement you want to make. We tend to forget the list when it’s too long or we throw in the towel on the whole of the resolve when one component of several is broken. 
  2. Make sure your resolution is very specific and measurable. “I want to be a better wife” is not as good as “I want to refrain from speaking back a second time in a situation of conflict. After I’ve let him know my opinion, I will defer to His leadership.”  “I want to study more” is not as good as “I will study on Monday-Friday from 6:00 am till 6:30 am, beginning each study session with prayer and studying the Digging Deep material.”   “I want to be evangelistic” is not as good as “I will ask one person per week to attend worship with me or to have a personal Bible study with me.” If it’s not something  you can sort of mentally check off, progress is hard to see. When progress is hard to see, it’s discouraging. 
  3. Write down your resolution and post where you will see it every day.
  4. Pray daily about this specific resolution. 
  5. Tell someone whom  you respect about your resolution, when feasible. This adds resolve and accountability.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

Finally, I’ve been listening to I Samuel while driving and it occurred to me as I was listening to the account of the fall of Saul, that resolve’s best friend is humility. Saul kept promising over and over to leave David alone; to stop trying to kill him. But over and over, he became so enamored with himself, trying to preserve his prestige, that he lost his good resolve. When I think I’m an expert, above sinking, or self-sufficient, I head into waters that are above my head every time. It’s when I’m constantly afraid of messing up…it’s when I have  a healthy lack of self-esteem and an even healthier Christ-esteem, that I am more protective of my purity and more serious about sanctification. It’s when I’m keenly aware of my shortcomings and my need for mercy that I want to extend His grace, through evangelism, to others. I am just tethered to good resolve by the realization that I am needy before God; that there’s obvious room for improvement. Resolve is anchored in “taking heed.”  “Let every one who thinks he stands, take heed lest he fall” (I Cor. 10:12). Happy New Year! 

Bless Your Heart by Cindy Colley

Coconut Oil for MY Pantry

Posted on February 24, 2016

Coconut-Oil-WebClearly, I was distracted. I’m not sure you can be clearly distracted, but I was…let’s say…strung out. I had Ezra, my 17-month-old grandson with me, so that’s automatic happiness and automatic craziness. I was headed to an out-of-town meeting with some folks. Glenn was driving me in a horrific rainstorm and so I was looking at my iPhone; reading some email and Facebook prayer requests and requests for counsel about some marriage issues. The house I’d left behind had laundry all over the hall floor and toy trucks and helicopters and mermaids and crumbs everywhere. All over the bedroom floor was unpacked luggage from earlier trips. There was unread mail and unpacked shopping items on the counter (Wish that was all that was on the counter.) It had been a day for squeezing in stuff I did not expect. In fact, I had done a few of those kinds of days back to back.

Earlier in the week, my sisters and I had made a firm decision to inject coconut oil into the food at my dad’s house to boost his short-term memory abilities. We’d read amazing things in places like this—http://www.naturalnews.com/039811_coconut_Alzheimers_dementia.html. Although we know you can’t believe everything  you read on the internet, we thought “What can it hurt?”  We’d also been trying to figure out how we were going to juggle things during the upcoming week of the gospel meeting where my Dad worships, which, coincidentally, occurs at the same time as our own gospel meeting at West Huntsville. He would need help with things like getting his dishes to the fellowship hall, parking, etc…so we were all about making a plan for that week.

Well, somehow, in the frantic fray of the afternoon, I got confused about the date of the gospel meeting at Jacksonville. So I proceeded to make my daily afternoon check-in call to Dad:

Me: “Hey, Dad. How are you doing?”

Dad: “Pretty good. How are you?”

Me: “We’re good. Are you getting ready for church?”

Dad: For church? This is not Sunday, is it?”

Me: No, but Dad, did you forget? It’s your gospel meeting!”

Dad: “To tell the truth, I guess I did forget. I better get up and get my socks on and go to that. I guess it’s at seven?”

Me: “Yes. It’s at seven. You still have time, But I’m worried about you. You do not remember going to the meeting yesterday?”

Dad: “No, I can’t really remember that, but, I’ll get ready and go. I’m glad you called me because I was going to forget all about that.”

So then, of course, I contacted Sami, my sister who had just left his house. No answer. I tried her husband…her son. No response. Finally I left a message on Sami’s phone…”Dad did not even remember that the gospel meeting was happening this week. Did you figure out someone to help him with the fellowship meals and the driving? Let me hear when you get a chance. Love you.”

A few minutes later, I got a call from Sami.

Sami: “Hey…but the meeting is not this week. Remember? It’s the first week in March?”

Me: “Oh dear. You are right. I have to go right now. Bye.”

Of course, I immediately called my Dad, who was hurrying, as much as a nonagenarian hurries, to try and get there by seven. Bless him. He was going to brave the storm to get to an evangelistic effort that I just thought was happening at the Jacksonville church of Christ. On learning that I was the one with the mental glitch, he said “Well, I didn’t think there was a meeting going on, but I took your word for it. Thank you for calling me back. I think I’ll go back to bed, roll back over and go back to sleep.”

Four lessons learned (or at least temporarily cognitively stored in short-term memory):

  1. When you truly trust someone, you just put aside everything you were thinking and go with the trusted individual . That’s, unfortunately, what my dad did. He trusted me. That was not the right thing to do, because I’m obviously fallible (and crazy). But that’s how we are with the heavenly Father if we really trust him, and it is the right thing to do.  We’re willing to ditch our own plans and do life His way.
  2. Love your sisters. It’s a group effort to successfully serve your father on earth. It is certainly a group effort to serve the heavenly Father. You need your sisters. They’ll help you keep life straight. Thank God for them every day.
  3. Focus on the Father. Sometimes things…even important things…can make you lose your focus and get mixed up about what’s going on with the most important relationship..the one with the Father.
  4. Don’t be trying to get the speck out of someone else’s eye when the beam is in your own eye (Matthew 7:3-5). That’s exactly what I was doing…going nuts over the fact that my dad was forgetting important things when it was actually me who was forgetting. Sometimes I do that with sin. The sin that drives me crazy in the lives of others is the very sin with which I struggle or even to which I fall. Keep trying to help others overcome sin, but be sure you always have the humility and focus to look inwardly while you’re helping others (Galatians 6:1)….

Maybe you need to get the coconut oil for your own pantry. It is going on my grocery list for my own pantry…today! If it doesn’t work, I hope you’ll visit me at the home.

Bless Your Heart by Cindy Colley

Magnify Him!

Posted on April 14, 2011
As you read today, I am in West Palm Beach, Florida. It’s an extreme privilege to be able to address women from some 15 congregations in South Florida about the Lord of Lords. As I prepare this topic, a big obstacle to my preparation keeps resurfacing. How can I, a weak mortal, sin-laden woman expect to comprehend, much less convey the magnificence of the Lord of Lords?

When you magnify print, you make it larger to your eye. You have to get that glass just right for your line of vision or the glass does no good at all. Sometimes people desperately need the Lord. But he is not always clearly visible to them as the answer they need. We, as Christians, sometimes are the glass. We serve to enlarge the Lord to them. We make His all sufficiency clearer to them. We project His image in the boldest print. We just magnify Him to those around us.

Psalm 69:30 says I can magnify God with thanksgiving. Do I show others His greatness by constantly expressing my gratitude to Him and others around me for His mercies? Job 36:24 says we magnify Him because of His work which men behold. When we comment to others about the beautiful full moon, the rainbow, the dogwoods, the storm, the snow or the deer, do we mention the greatness of their Designer? Ezekiel 38:23 talks about the magnificence of God in a context of the fierceness of his judgment. Do I ever even speak about the judgment of God? This characteristic must be enlarged in our culture in which God’s grace is often magnified to the exclusion of the impending judgment. His grace is relevant (needed) only because of the judgment over which his mercy triumphs (James 2:13).

You get the point. The characteristics of God are righteous altogether.  They are unchanging and they are what make God…God. But we are the magnifiers. We are the enlargers. While we do not enlarge the Lord of Lords Himself, for He is the fullness of Him who fills all in all, we can magnify or enlarge Him in the sight of unbelievers. The print on the page remains the same size, but the glass makes it look big to the reader. People see God through us. We can, even in our weakness,  cause them to see the perfection of God that they might otherwise overlook. In the process, we may bring them along to heaven with us.

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